She has the worst job, poor thing.
And she got PAID!!!! I’d have worked for free!
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a) how will you cut your nails
b) how will you remove it
c) Why would you do this
d) what made them decide 53 was the place to stop
*Greasy haired teenager in a Led Zeppelin shirt voice* A laptop isn’t an instrument
Detective: what do we got
Officer: looks like a classic phone fumble. guy dropped his phone right on his face like a jackass. died instantly
i’m sad ‘cause when i went swimming today the 5 foot part went all the way up to my eyes and i had to stand on my toes to breath
i’m being discriminated against dangnabbit
hahah you’re short
hahah i’m gonna stab you in the neck
If you can even reach my neck
here i come motherfucker